No Pants, No Problem

Oh, God!...

…sometimes life is just too darn fun! I just found myself on an Intenet porn site!

Ok, ok. I exaggerate. Hazard of the PR trade. Actually, I didn't find myself on this very Internet porn site. But I was supposed to find myself on this very porn site because I did get a Google Alert that nude pictures of me were on it. (I'd asked Google to notify me daily by email of any sites, news, or blogs using the term "Fake-Rob Williams.") Look at what the Alert said:

Nude Gay Men Pictures :: N A P Nude Pictures
It's Me, Fake-Rob Williams I was thinking that, when my nude photos get "discovered," I might get. I told him to go home and have a snack and a ...

You think I made that up, God? Well here's a screenshot of the Alert.

Alas, I followed the link and found nothing about myself. Nothing! I thought I'd share my disappointment with my new friend Philip because of his professed interest in nude pictures of me.

It was when I visited his blog to get his email address that I discovered another big disappointment. Apparently, we at Vermont Yankee won't have enough money to handle plant decommissioning until 2032, even though our license expires in 2012. The full report, which is available here and was created by Margaret Gundersen of Fairewinds Associates, Inc. says:

Entergy Nuclear Vermont Yankee [herein simply referred to as Entergy] has made a series of non-conservative assumptions concerning the decommissioning of Vermont Yankee Nuclear Power Plant and its Decommissioning Fund. Moreover, we (Fairewinds Associates, Inc) opine that Entergy's non-conservative assumptions, which are clearly delineated in their submittal to the PSB, may shift both the risk and burden of financing Vermont Yankee's actual dismantlement to the State of Vermont and future generations of Vermonters.

Whoa! Somehow lots of people thought that money was at the ready. I'm not sure, maybe even I did. I guess that's the power of good PR, for which I can take at least partial credit, which means I guess I can also take credit for confusing myself, which is kind of fun.

But there's some good news in this news cycle for Vermont Yankee. Bad News Bear Philip's story did not mention the other recent eyebrow raiser. That's the fact that the nuclear engineer with the Vermont Public Service Department turns out not to be a nuclear engineer at all. He has an undergraduate degree in Physics and a Master's Degree in Health Science. He used to work for the state of Maine and, you'll remember, Maine Yankee was shut down for safety reasons even though the NRC had declared its safety rating "adequate.". Oops. There I go again. Hazard of the trade. Actually, the NRC did mention that certain…

…weaknesses and deficiencies appear to be related to two root causes: economic pressures to contain costs and poor problem identification as a result of complacency and a lack of a questioning attitude.

OK. So even though it got a passing grade, it got a scolded, and then it ended up getting an independent safety assessment, which it failed. Then it was shut down.

Vermont Yankee has been scolded by the NRC, too. But non-engineer Uldis assures that we don't need an independent safety assessment here. "Without a doubt, if I compare Vermont Yankee to when Maine Yankee was running into trouble, there's no comparison. Vermont Yankee is not experiencing the mechanical difficulties that Maine Yankee was," he said. Or so The Rutland Herald reported.

But you gotta wonder: Who is a guy with a Masters in Health Science to assure anybody about mechanical integrity?

Anyway, Lord, I am hot on the tracks of this Google Alert mystery. Because, frankly, though it's fun to think that attention is being drawn to me (and that I might finally get a singing part in The Day The Earth Stood Still), there's no way my bosses are going to see this Internet porn false alarm as reflecting well on Vermont Yankee. And creating news that reflects well on Vermont Yankee is, after all, my job, at least until my singing career takes off.

Love,

Fake-Rob